11 December 2014

Gentlefolk,

Today is the 3rd anniversary of my mother's death, and I want to dedicate this post to her memory.

Herewith a snapshot.

Mum (in later life the whole family called her Omi, which is 'grandmother' in German) was born in Dresden, Germany on 18 May 1920 and christened Edeltraut Johanna Goerner. Aussies couldn't get their tongue around her name so she used the shortened version 'Traudi'.

She grew up in a loving family and reveled in the culture and history of Dresden.

When she was 20 she was drafted into the war effort, and sent to a radar station on Germany's north coast where she worked as an administrative assistant.  In March 1945, with Germany facing certain defeat, the radar station was abandoned and she returned to Dresden only to find the city in ruins. Her immediate family survived the devastating bombing: her father, mother, and elder sister (who had two little girls - her husband would join them later) - a miracle.

Somehow they managed to get to Bavaria, the American Zone, and settled in a small town called Weilheim, between Munich and Garmisch. She met my father, Akos Olah, who had been an officer in the Hungarian army, became a prisoner of war, and was later designated a "DP" (Displaced Person) when he refused to return to Soviet-occupied Hungary .

They had three children in quick succession (the 4th was born in Australia).  Germany was devastated and the future of Europe looked bleak.  So, like many others in similar situation, they decided to seek their fortune elsewhere.

Australia was the first to offer them sanctuary, so that's where we ended up in January 1951. After a while Dad got a job in Cooma NSW on the Snowy Mountains scheme.  The scheme was completed in 1974, Dad was retrenched, and they moved to Canberra.  He passed way on 25 July 1990 (aged 78) and Mum on 11 December 2011 (aged 91).

I'm sure everyone's mother is special, and Mum was no exception.

For us children, it was all a big adventure.  But looking back now we marvel at her strength and resilience. She bore four children in difficult circumstances - for example, the day before I was born she was out searching for fruit which had fallen to the ground. The voyage to the other side of the world was a nightmare, spent in the hold of an ex-troop carrier. The country they came to was strange: language, food, attitudes, manners, everything was different; no family, no friends.

She was made of stern stuff.  Always the optimist, she experienced hard times but refused to give in to despondency and despair.

A woman's capacity to protect her young and care for them is truly amazing.  I honestly don't know how she did it, but she always seemed to be there when we needed her.  A cup of hot chocolate on a winter's day, a band-aid for a cut, a kind word, and a gentle smile of encouragement when we felt down.

Her children and later her grandchildren always came first.  They had to be fed, clothed, cleaned, kept warm, while her own comfort and needs were set aside.

She was a very special lady.  May she rest in peace.

Here are some photos of the last year or two of her long, eventful, life.

Omi died on 11 December 2011. Over 100 family and friends attended the funeral service at St Pat's church in Braddon.  She is buried in Gungahlin Cemetery in Canberra. Her four children: Alex, Angie, Andy, and Aniko at the burial.  She instructed mourners to 'wear something yellow' as she wanted us to celebrate the joys of her life, not the hardships.

May 2011 Omi finally left her home and moved into Morshead Retirement Home in Lyneham, Canberra.  She had a nice room and was well looked-after.  When her health started deteriorating, Vera & I quickly returned from China and we were able to spend the last two weeks with her -  a precious time.  Angie came up from the coast.  Here we are chatting with Mum and singing songs.   Her mind was sharp till the end - we were often surprised at her ability to recite long poems and songs from her youth.

Omi always loved the festive season.  Here Aniko is singing Xmas carols with her. Aniko, despite her very busy job, was always the first there in the morning, and the last to put her to bed at night.

Omi surrounded by her extended family.  It was Aniko's birthday, January 2011. 

Aniko's birthday, January 2011.

My favorite photo with Omi.  We attended a function at the Indonesian Embassy, September 2010. This photo is the background on the Dedication Page of my book "It's all about the students". 

The three most important women in my life: mother, wife, and daughter, Canberra 2010.

January 2010, Mum with 3 of her 4 children; Angie 'missing in action'.

Andy's 60th birthday celebrations, January 2009.

The family always celebrated Xmas at Mum's house in Ainslie. She spent hours decorating the living room, and preparing the food.  It was a special time.  

A few simple words can't convey the kindness, the inner-beauty, and strength of my mother.  But I wanted to try anyway and it was good to go through the process on this day.

...

That's it for this post.

Only 3 weeks of teaching left for me this semester.  The final exams will be held in the week beginning 4 January 2015;  a few days of marking, then we will head south, to warmer climes.

 Until the next post, keep well and keep smiling.

Alex & Vera Olah
English teachers at the China University of Petroleum, Qingdao
www.upc.edu.cn/english/
Thursday, 11 December 2014